The New York Marathon - Oct/Nov 2015

Thurs 29th Oct 2015

Hello New Yorrrrrrrrrk! The beginning of my second jaunt to the greatest city in the world starts with a very unconventional and healthy breakfast at Manchester Airport. I have become so accustomed to that 5am airport beer that a super healthy smoothie just felt wrong. The flight passes without a hitch and soon we're in the thick of a Brooklyn traffic jam. GoPros are in operation trying to soak up every last sinew of New York delight. 

Then we see it........the monster that is Manhattan. The Empire State, new World Trade, Chrysler, Roc, UN....they're all there. 

First problem, the hotel room we've booked is unavailable so we're given a double room with the option of upgrading to a 2 bedroom for $100, PER NIGHT! We baulk at this and settle for the double room. On inspection, we rapidly come to the conclusion that the bed is minuscule for 2 burly men so definitely too small for us. Thus not giving us ideal sleep prep for the big race on Sunday. Plus they want to charge us circa $50 for wifi. We make the executive decision to upgrade and it is the best decision we ever made. The new room is a palace with a huge lounge, conference room, 3 flat screen TVs, free wifi, you get the picture. It's epic. Delighted. 

Next up, Grand Central Station

Times Square. 

Authentic American Diner with waffle fries, delish. 

Madison Square Garden for the Knicks!

The Knicks game is crazy. There is an incredible graphics montage set to music on the court floor before tip-off showing all the players. It was mind-blowing. At regular intervals the game would stop and ridiculously enthusiastic kids would charge onto the court with guns that fire out t-shirts into the crowd. Why? Probably to detract away from the Knicks getting 'their asses handed to them' on the court. A quote from a fellow Knick fan. There was even special timeouts for kids doing rather exuberant acrobatics, the New York City Dancers and of course, cheerleaders. I know Americans eat a lot but my god, the size and sheer volume the guys around me consumed was inhumane. Gluttonous pigs I though as I sat there sipping my bottled water. There was even quite a few celebrity fans in the crowd. David Duchovny, Kate Upton, Ed Burns and Jimmy Fallon. Our evening was complete with a walk past the Empire State Building to our temporary abode at the UN. 

Fri 30th Oct

First stop, Grand Central Station to grab the Subway down to Battery Park for the ferry to the Statue of Liberty. Not without a hearty breky from an authentic American diner. Gorgeous French toast with spicy sausage and English tea are just the tonic for a great day. 

Got to go up to the pedestal but that's pretty pointless, the view is virtually identical. 

Next stop, the new World Trade Centre observatory. The tone of the experience is the future. There is only 1 reference to the twin towers, which I guess is understandable. The lift ride is fantastic with a graphic that surrounds you and has a time lapse film showing how the New York skyline has developed over the last 130 years. 

Ground zero. 

Wall Street. 

Brooklyn Bridge at sunset. 

Red velvet cheesecake. Unbelievable. 

Sat 31st Oct

Off to the marathon Expo to pick up our entry pack and most importantly, race bib. The scene is a plethora of middle class affluence chewing up every possible commercial ounce the corporate behemoths have to offer. There's a pleasant atmosphere and us 2 marathon virgins can start to feel the excitement building. Damo falls in love with some snazzy Brooks trainers with a commemorative 'NYC 2015' logo embossed onto them.

$163, cheaper than in the UK and exclusive to the US so a bit of a steal. 

The afternoon consists of a substantial journey north and off the island of Manhattan to the Bronx. *cue dramatic music dun-dun-dunnnnnnn* When we arrive at Yankee Stadium there's a definite edge in the air and you suddenly don't feel as safe. The stadium is virtually deserted and there's very little activity in the club shop. 

So we make the executive decision not to hang around much longer and get the hell outta dodge. 

And so to our evening before the big race. This consists of a 'pasta party' and longing through the windows of bars filled with revellers celebrating Halloween. Going home and getting an early night was 1 of the most difficult things I've had to do but sacrifices are the name of the marathon game. 

Sun 1st Nov - THE NEW YORK CITY MARATHON

The BIG BIG day is finally here, 33 years in the making. Today we take on the biggest challenge of our lives. All those weeks of long runs, no alcohol and no social life is the culmination of what will happen today. It starts with a delicious 5am alarm, in a strange stroke of good fortune the clocks went back an hour so it didn't feel as horrific as it could have done. Bags packed, race gear on, lists checked, twice, thrice, time to start our epic journey to Central Park. 

First up, a taxi ride to the very south of Manhattan to the Staten Island ferry terminal. Ferry boarded, Hudson crossed, now it's time for a bus to the Runners' Village. Then the long wait begins, 2 hours in the cold with no entertainment and only our own nervous thoughts. Strong minds required. 

Finally we are called to our start coral. Unfortunately our running top seems to attract a very strange gentleman from London. He says some odd things and rather out stays his welcome but we lose him before the start line thank god!   

The MC really gets the crowd going and there's some party tunes blasting out. This is the New York marathon! And we're off! The first part of the journey is 2 miles over the Verrazano bridge, it's quite steep and we even see someone collapse after 1 mile. Scary stuff. 

Mile 2-13 is Brooklyn. The people are wonderful, extremely enthusiastic and very encouraging. There's bands, gospel choirs, people handing out sweets or bananas. Thoroughly enjoyable. 

Mile 13-14 is Queens. Fantastic welcome from the people of Queens. Short but sweet. 14 miles in, feeling great, just behind our target time by a few minutes. Then it all begins to go wrong. 

Mile 14-16 The Queensborough Bridge which takes you into Manhattan for the first time. The first half of the bridge is very, very steep. It seems to go on forever and ever. This kills me. Whoever said New York was flat has never run it. Believe me, this incline on the bridge is massive. 

Mile 16-19 The run down First Avenue is incredible, the sheer volume of people is amazing. However, after the bridge I'm starting to struggle. With 10 miles still to go, my feet are really starting to hurt. Every step I take is now a PB, I'm now in un-chartered territory. 

Mile 19-21 The Bronx and another 2 bridges with substantial inclines. I walk for the first time, I can't do any more running uphill. The people are incredibly lively and the music is probably the best on the entire course. 

Mile 21-23 Back on Manhattan running down 5th Avenue. The crowds are enormous, I'm giving it everything I've got but I'm in serious trouble. 

Mile 23-26 We enter Central Park and I run out of gas. I can't run any more but I will not accept defeat so I push on. Running every now and again. The cheers from the crowd can't inspire me, it's just me and the uncompromising road. It's the most excruciating pain I've ever been through and I hit the wall. 

Mile 26-26.2 The home stretch, the final furlong, the last hurrah, the end of my cruciate knee ligaments? I calculate it is now only 320 metres (difficult in my current state) until this ordeal will be over so I give it every last ounce of blood, sweat and tears in order to run across the finish line. Damo like a true hero and friend stayed with me the entire time even though he could have run faster. WE MADE IT! It's over, it's over, it's finally all over. 

Now at the end, you would expect it's all fun and games. No, this is where the pain really kicks in. All the finishers are funnelled into lines to pick up their respective bags and replenishment. It seems to take an age and there's nowhere to sit. Most of the roads are shut so this leaves us with the much less desirable option of the subway. It's quite a complicated way home and the signs are confusing. An NYPD officer takes pity on us and let's us on for free. You would think the journey would be over by now, not a chance. There's still a taxi through terrible traffic from Times Square before we can put our feet up. 

No more running ever!

That's enough for 1 day. Oh no, we still had time to party like rock stars. Dinner at Dos Caminos for sumptuous guac and cactus margaritas. Then on to the Ink Hotel and the Press Lounge rooftop bar. It's incredible and just what we wanted. 

Prosecco at the ready boys, it's party time!

Mon 2nd Nov

You would think after a marathon and night on the town that this day would be all about recovery. Not so. After a final American breky of pancakes, ham and scrambled egg we manage to squeeze in a trip to the very top of the Empire State Building. 

Burgers and authentic Brooklyn Lager in a sports bar along 5th Ave and a trip to see the Flatiron Building or for Spider-man fans, the Daily Bugle.

Then alas, it is time to head to JFK and leave this wonderful city that we temporarily called home. Perfect trip. Thank you New York, you've been wonderful.

La Tomatina - Valencia - Madrid - Bilblao

Tue 25th Aug - Valencia

The holiday begins with the customary 5am start and a baggage breakdown at Manchester Airport causes the patrons of scum air to go into meltdown. After the chaos is carefully circumnavigated, fresh beers await airside.

With time to kill in Charleroi airport, a little jaunt to the city centre is in order. Very little to see, I'd rather have stayed in the airport toilet for a couple of hours. Back at the airport is a rather senior stag party complete with matching La Tomatina tees. 

Arrive in Valencia and meet Oscar, our host, he's very friendly and provides us with everything we need. Quick explore of Valencia, it's very small but the architecture is fantastic. Sample some Cava Sangria, totes delish. 

Wed 26th Aug-Valencia

LA TOMATINA! What we've all been waiting for is finally upon us. It begins with a sangria party at 8am. Ben decides to take it upon himself to have a little pre-tomato rumble with Sangria and is completely doused. Ladies, heavy flow! It soon turns into a Sangria fight with hundreds of people getting involved. Even the reps don't hold back. 

Suitably soaked we head into Bunõl for the main event. With a couple of hours to go, the crowd are funnelled into the narrow streets where the tomato trucks unload. An odd form of pre-fight entertainment is on show. A greased up 30 foot pole with some Serrano ham hanging tantalisingly close is set upon by the savages. I watch for 2 hours as people constantly climb on each other to try and get the ham. It looks brutal. At 1 point a rather trim looking young lady gets near the top of the pole but the story doesn't end there. A rugged not-so gentle man dressed as a barbarian decides to remove the young lady's lower garments leaving her toned posterior exposed to the 20,000 strong horde. The inevitable immense embarrassment follows and the biggest cheer of the day goes up. Not before the barbarian fully exposes his meat and 2 veg for all to see. This goes on for too long. 

Ammo and Ben decide to get in on the action but don't make it to stage 2 on the human pyramid. The petard sounds and all hell breaks loose for an hour as 175 tonnes of tomatoes are hurled wildly in every direction. The aroma of the squashed Tomatoes does mask the hideous stench of 20,000 sweaty bodies. Throughout I struggle to see through the blizzard of toms. Amazing fun, painful but an experience I will never forget. 

Then to get hosed down and get the bus back. Not before a celebratory beer obviously. The morning really takes it out of us so a long nap is in order before we go to the after party in the evening. We are bussed to an old industrial estate where we enter a very slick outdoor club. Complete with Ibiza vibe and a cool DJ (we later find out he's a bit of fraud but hey). 

Many, many drinks are consumed while we dance our arses off and generally look like tools but that's no different to any other day. 

So the end of the night comes and the long bus back but not before we discuss the day's hot topic, top 5 Backstreet Boys songs of all time. As well as who is your favourite BS boy. It's an unequivocal Brian from Ammo, zero hesitation. 

Thurs 27th Aug-Madrid

The day begins with a corking hangover, cleaning up the tomato destruction that has followed us home and packing. A short walk to the train station and we're on our way. The train is rather luxurious and 2 hours fly by. Next stop Madrid!

Confuse the hell out of our taxi driver who drives around for what seems like 2 days before he finally finds the flat. He even has the cheek to claim part of the change as a tip?!

Our lovely host 'Mar' hasn't quite finished cleaning so we're despatched to the local cervezaria. Later in the evening we go for some excellent tapas at Taberno Concha in La Latina. 

This wipes Ben and I out and are ready for sleepy times. Ammo unperturbed by flying solo heads out looking for some evening delight. He finds it in the shape of a young Bolivian bar maid who shows him the sights of the city, lovely girl.  

Fri 28th Aug-Madrid

Set off bright and early (11.30am) into the centre of Madrid for a little sightseeing. We take in the Plaza Mayor and the Puerto del Sol before heading off to Buen Retiro Park. 

After a quick pit stop for beer and cocktails we set off onto the high seas where our porter rows us around the lake, while B and I sup another beer. 

There was a severe sunburn risk as in my infinite wisdom I forgot to apply the necessary epidermis protection for the midday ball of sky fire. Time will tell if this was a rash decision or a carefully calculated risk that ultimately provided unbridled joy. 

Next up was the roof top bar at El Corte Anglés at Gran Via for some gourmet burgers that strangely all arrived with just lettuce and a beef patty, I'm no foodie but I expect a tad more than the average McConsumer. I couldn't fault the succulence of the beef though. 

In the evening, we turn it up a notch to just below gangster at another rather swanky rooftop bar at the ME hotel in Sol. Think Radio City in London but poorly designed. Both bars are in the wrong locations, covering the stunning views to the North and West. It does provide a pleasant view of the plaza below and a rather tasty Absolut Kurrant and lemonade. A and B prefer to follow the crowd and jump on the Gin bandwagon. 

Next up is the lively area of Malasana for some awesome steak and red wine. We continue our evening by venturing to a club called Joy. It's quite cool, although it does have a slightly Ritz vibe to the decor. We get talking to a few tourists, who to our surprise say they're from Manchester?! How long have you lived there, err 2 years. I'm originally from a small village near Southampton. Hmm, not a bad effort but nothing on the girl in London who said she was from Manchester and was actually from Huddersfield. The horror. The Madrid sunshine has taken it out of us so B and I retire but A stays out....again. This time visiting another part of South America, Colombia. I'm led to believe she looked like Gloria from Modern Family. All I'll say is that we'd been drinking all day......

Sat 29th Aug-Madrid/Bilbao

Interesting start to the day, extremely hungover as the next guests troop through the front door complete with cases, kids and a rather disheveled look. Our host thinks we've gone and decides to let the next incumbents into the flat while we're still packing up. Awks isn't the word. After a saunter across town for a much needed full English we head to get our train to Bilbao. It's quite a hefty journey, 5 hours in total. 

We arrive at our new home for the next couple of days and eventually our AirBnB host appears, God knows what she'd been doing, we didn't ask! 

Next stop, the street parties of Bilbao. It is a bit like a festival in the middle of a city with music stages and Oktoberfestesque tents. There's all kinds of music playing, from awful Europop to Death Metal. We happen across a gay tent where the lesbian bar tenders just looked right through A. You can pick your favourite form of descrimination as a reason, we got all bases covered here. A was raging and he swears he was about to 'slap' someone. Luckily I calm him down by taking him to a tent that was playing Taylor Swift's much maligned global smash 'Shake it off'. He certainly did shake it off. The only thing missing was a Backstreet Boys hit and the night would have been perfecto. 

Sun 30th Aug - Bilbao

Another day, another hangover....unless you're B and was sensible the night before. Not sure I've said that this millennium. Today we head for the Guggenheim, it's an extremely impressive  edifice. 

The first exhibition we see is a collection by Jean-Michel Basquiat. In my opinion it was pretty dreadful but each to their own. The Jeff Koons collection was excellent though. See the steel poodle below. Shhh you weren't allowed to take pictures and security were constantly hovering within taser distance. 

Later it was time to sample Bilbao's most famous drink, the Kalimotxo. Pronounced cal-i-moto. It is half a glass of red wine poured over ice and topped up with cola. Sounds disgusting, tastes worse! Ok not really, it's a delight for the taste buds and 1 swiftly turns into 3. 

Sadly this brings an end to proceedings of the Basque kind and all things Espagne. Gracias España, has sido maravillosa (you've been wonderful). 

South American Odyssey Feb 2015

Day 1 - Sat 7th Feb - Manchester/Frankfurt

It begins.....

Wahey....

Day 2 - Sun 8th Feb - Rio

Zero sleep on the flight but surprisingly upbeat. Copacabana beach is hit with some vigorous force at 9am. The locals had no idea what to do with 5 mini milks seeking Beer. 

Needless to say everyone was intimidated by our samba and football skills. 

Danny's Joey Barton impression is still causing no end of amusement. Also coconut milk plus Rum = Very Strong!

Carnival rehearsal evening was cut short somewhat by an outbreak of sunburn debilitating the 4 geniuses in my party. Not before we had a minor altercation with a drunk and abusive local on the Metro. Lobsters took centre stage. 

Day 3 - Mon 9th Feb - Rio

Morning swim in the rooftop pool at the hotel with 30 degree heat and Christ the Redeemer watching over us. 

Sharing a 'small' mohito on the Copacabana and then went for an incredible Classic Brazilian grill in the evening. The meat was not only sensational but endless. There were no red and green cards that you get in the UK, you just had to keep eating! The salad bar was also exquisite. 

Day 4 - Tue 10th Feb - Rio

The day started with a bang, a hefty 30 minute workout in the rooftop gym/sauna. The afternoon saw 3 intrepid explorers that encompassed Dave, Dan and Ben head into the jungle I.e. the centre of Rio. There was a slight mishap when Ben accidentally went into the National Chilean Conference Centre looking for the loo but luckily the men with machine guns saw the funny side. 

The Novo Metropolitana Catedral. 

Onward across the East of the city, a standoff with riot police, helicopters, amoured vehicles, gun shots and protesters was delicately negotiated to reach the National Library and the Natural History Museum. Stunning city centre that had echoes of New York but with a kind of clammy heat that words can never do justice to. 

Day 5 - Wed 11th Feb - Rio/Lima/Cusco

The day or should I say, previous night begins with a 4am taxi ride across Rio to the airport. 4 passengers for 3 seats, red lights taking on a completely new meaning, a new way of selecting lanes and borderline psychotic breaking distances are just some of the terms to describe the white-knuckle ride. 

It doesn't get much better at the airport either. Our connecting flight to Cusco from Lima has been double booked and the next available flight is not for another 5 hours. Instead of this getting the better of the less than perky group at 6am, a plan was hatched to take a little trip into Lima. 

So the group kill a bit of time in the historic Lima city centre. Beers are enjoyed in the main square to the sound of a major government protest with hundreds of people taking part. Well no one likes it dull do they.....

Cusco, wow what a place. It felt like being back in Africa, very third world. However, it had that innocent charm and feeling of inhabitants genuinely happy with their existence despite the extreme poverty and row upon row of delapidated shacks. Our host at the Backpackers hostel was an absolute fire-cracker and never shut up (in Spanish) despite having no clue what she was talking about. 

Day 6 - Thu 12th Feb - Cusco/Machu Picchu

Another early start. This time taxis were at 5am. The initial route to Machu Picchu is via coach to a temporary train station in Pachar. We then embark onto the Vistadome (quaint little train) along the Urubamba river taking in the incredible views on the way to Aguas Callientes (village next to Machu Picchu). 

Once in Aguas Callientes, the trek to Machu Picchu begins to somewhat heated debate and consternation. In the end it was decided to hike the 1.7km up to the entrance of Machu Picchu rather than take the 20 minute bus. The intense heat and rain pushed the group to the limit but Danny with his insatiable enthusiasm and lack of awareness drove the group on. Within 90 minutes, we had conquered and reached the start....

Now our journey of enlightenment and discovery could begin. After a relatively short walk we reached the citadel of Machu Picchu, the great and spectacular wonder of the world. However, with heavy cloud in abundance, nothing could be seen. 

We decided to explore the 'Sun Gate', we assumed this would be a bit of a hike but it turned into an 80 minute trek that divided the group. In what can only be described as the biggest anti-climax in human history, we reached the top only to be hugely disappointed with what we found. More clouds and a completely unremarkable structure. 

You can feel the devastation. So we trudged back down the thousands of steps with a feeling of solace only football fanatics will understand. Until......

.....out of the clouds, rose up like a young Christ the Redeemer, a glimpse of the citadel peaked into view. The sun was out! Rapturous applause and a raucous group descended onto the viewing zone like a group of young school girls heading to a 1 Direction concert. We had appeased the sun gods with our monumental climbs and they repaid us in spades. 

In the evening, we pottered into Cusco to sample the local delicacies, Guinea Pig and Alpaca. The more adventurous (Kyran and Dan) did not enjoy what they found at the Andean Grill. Truly awful!

Day 7 - Fri 13th Feb - Cusco/Lima/Buenos Aires

Yet ANOTHER early start, this time the alarm was set for 5.30am. On this occasion we make our connecting flight in Lima. Thank you Avianca! Idiota. 

The haggling with foreign taxi drivers continues where we left off. Now in Buenos Aires we book the 'South American 5 seater' I.e. room for only 4 passengers. 

The evening begins with one of the most incredible meals we've ever had. The steak and red wine is absolutely sublime. The restaurant is called La Cabrera situated in the middle class metropolis of Palermo. 

After dinner and getting an awesome blue rate on the dollar, Danny begins to chat up men in the street. In the end, this turns out to be a touch of genius. The young Argentine gentleman not only pays for us to get into the most exclusive club in Palermo but buys some drinks. The club is like an alternate universe with no chavs, the decor is stunning, there is no queue at the bar, the patrons are polite, the security are invisible, the drinks are cheap, this is the best club in the world! At 6am the night is called, gracias y buenas noches Buenos Aires. Although the bar by our apartment was just getting going with some slamming base lines. 

Day 8 - Sat 14th Feb - Buenos Aires

After a 6am finish, I finally get a lie in albeit only until 11am. After making some 'dollar bill' videos (don't ask) we head out to the laundrette only to find it temporarily closed. So we did what any self-respecting young men would do on a beautiful sunny Saturday in BA, went for lunch (and a few sherbets of course). The restaurant was called Cambo Bravo and it was excellent. We later return to the laundrette only to find it closed. Here is a link to Dan's trailer of our epic journey and what happened in light of recent developments. 

We stumble upon a parade near the apartment and suddenly I'm in the centre of it, being dressed up, the paparazzi are there, it all kicks off! 

 

We somehow find a craft beer bar that has a feeling of American authenticity, it was fantastic. 

Day 9 - Sun 15th Feb - Buenos Aires

Today there are more culinary delights for us to sample in Palermo, Mexican! The quesadillas and enchorizarders were awesome. However, their attempt at making a Margarita left a little to be desired. 

The next trip involved a 1 hour bus journey to Boca. We couldn't understand what the bus driver was saying and he lost patience with us and let us get on for free. Then the awkwardness began. The plan was to attend a Boca Juniors match. On the bus, some young Boca fans had quite a few comments when they found out we were English. Not all of them good. The Falklands was mentioned, eek! The approach to the stadium was somewhat dicey. We stuck out a mile and all eyes were on us. It was so intense we decided to skip the game and head home. It was a crazy experience, possibly a tad dangerous but overall very good. The intensity didn't end there when a veteran of the Falklands war got on and started preaching to the bus. Luckily he didn't realise we were English as the situation could have escalated. Unfortunately we couldn't get any pictures today. 

Day 10 - Mon 16th Feb - Buenos Aires

Head into Retiro, which is the centre of BA to have a look at the sights. Quite an impressive city with really wide roads not too dissimilar to Tokyo. Visit the mausoleum in Recoleta, which is incredible. Tonnes of enormous creepy crypts. 

In the evening, we head out to San Telmo to see a tango and go to a highly recommended restaurant called San Juan. Unfortunately we head out too late and the restaurant is shut. We scrabble around for something to eat but it's not up to scratch. Bit of disaster of an evening. Did at least catch a bit of the tango in Dorrego Square. 

Day 11 - Tue 17th Feb - Buenos Aires

Breakfast/lunch at our favourite cafe in Palermo, very boozy.......for some. Followed by an after hours swim (Mavi won't be happy!) before another sensational meal at La Cabrera, absolutely outstanding Kobe beef and Malbec wine. It really was 'the best'. 

Day 12 - Wed 18th Feb - Buenos Aires/Iguazu Falls

After another delightful visit from Mavi (AirBnB host) where she got a little excited about our nocturnal activities by the pool, we finally left 1531 Humboldt. We headed to find sustenance with our cases, on foot. Unfortunately, after 5 days of glorious unbroken sunshine, a tropical monsoon swept us up and spat us out. Thanks for the memories BA, muy hermoso. 

Into the jungle......we land on a minute concrete strip amongst the rain forests, incredible! We head to our hostel, which is an oasis with 241 beers and free wifi, it's the dream. 

Day 13 - Thu 19th Feb - Iguazu Falls

As is the theme for this adventure, we can't start an expedition without a very early start. The free breakfast is as you would expect, basic and barely edible. The customary hurricane arrives on our search for a telebanco (cash point).  When we finally arrive, the bank is in the midst of a Northern Rock style meltdown with armed police supervising withdrawals. No Pesos for Gringos! After an immense struggle through the roads that have now become rivers, we give up on the bus and get the South American 5-seater. I had the pleasure of sitting in the boot. 

Iguazu Falls: Incredible, absolutely incredible. Our first sojourn is by runaway mine train up to the Garganta Del Diablo (Devil's Throat). It is a thrilling ride with twists and turns and the occasional floor beast (coati) thrown in for good measure. 

There are a further 20 thousand waterfalls on our journey, each one unique and beautiful. The evening draws to a close with extremely strong Caipirinhas by the pool, it is a bit too much for some people. Others stay up and build diplomatic relations with Chile, a few lessons are learnt, mainly along the lines of prejudice and discrimination. Standard. 

Here is a sneak peek of our 'Escape from Iguazu'.

Day 14 - Fri 20th Feb - Iguazu Falls/Curritiba/Sao Paulo/Rio

Standard early start and added bonus of having to cross the border from Argentina into Brazil to get our flight to Rio via Curritiba and São Paulo. Arrive in Rio to some absolutely scorching heat, melting! The host of our AirBnB apartment for the week is yet another zany singleton that spoke like Grew from Despicable Me. As is the case with these kind of people, they waffle on far too long when all everyone wants to do is get down to their pants/speedos (other swimsuits are available) and chill out on the balcony. 

Sustenance again rears it's head and we have to go out to feed Ben. Luckily we find the same Bem Brazil type place that we found in Copacabana. Unfortunately, the second album is always a tricky one and failed to adequately live up to expectations. At the end of the meal, there was even a suggestion from the hostess that we do the dishes since we'd only tipped her 8%. The cheek!

Day 15 - Sat 21st Feb - Rio

Find an ex-pat type bar called Lord Cole's to watch all the Premier League footy. It was great, we were the only ones in there and we even got a Full English. Homemade passion fruit vodka smoothies became the order of the day, which were excellent.

In the evening, some of the party went out chasing wild geese. It was an inevitable fruitless journey. Found a 'bloco' (street party) by the beach, where some partied until the police arrived. It was a bit sketchy so we didn't stay long. 

Day 16 - Sun 22nd Feb - Rio

Hot tub time-machine.....minus the time-machine plus 5 lads in a penthouse apartment in Rio with alcohol, yes again it's the dream. Head out to a mid-afternoon bloco. Unfortunately, it's a gay bloco on the beach so we make a swift exit. 

Tonight we feast on Mexican food, it was excellent. Really enjoyed the Nachos, guac (of course) and the chicken burritos. Couple of drinks on Ipanema beach and then it's an early night in prep for our tour of Rio tomorrow!

Day 17 - Mon 23rd Feb - Rio

City tour! A co-worker of mine has put me in touch with his brother Kiko, who lives in Rio. He in turn kindly put me in touch with his soon to be mother-in-law, Angela. She took us on a very special tour of Rio with her driver Tedesco. They picked us up at 9am and escorted us to Corcovado in a seven seater car, yes they do exist! This was via the lagoon and botanical gardens at Lagoa. Beautiful area. 

Once up at the top of Corcovado, the structure of Christ is really quite stunning but the view over Rio even more so. 

Our tour continues through the barrio of Santa Teresa, again a very beautiful area surrounded by 'favelas'. Next stop is the historic old town, which was largely reclaimed land, that included a cathedral, the first bank and the first palace used by the Portuguese Royal family in 1503. 

We even have time to visit a real life favela. It's a bit dodge but our fantastic tour guide pulls some strings and we can enter (and exit) the 'ghetto'. 

Day 18 - Tue 24th Feb - Rio

Quiet morning followed by a stroll into Rio to sample Kiko's wedding venue. The steak was fantastic. We then stumble on a freshers' party at a local bar, they were showing the Champions' League so we HAD to stay for a couple, HAD to. 

The big meal and the beers finished us off so a quick saunter on the beach in the night sky for ice cream and photography concluded proceedings. 

Day 19 - Wed 25th Feb - Rio

Very relaxing day, went to Ipanema beach for fun and frolics in the sea. On the way back to the apartment we bump into a couple of Australians. Cool guys so the ever exuberant Danny invites them in and generously offers them everyone else's drinks. 

Later Dan and I go to Astor on the beach front to meet Bernardo's brother, Kiko. 

The drinks never stop arriving and by the end, everyone is somewhat tipsy. Great plan since we're all up at 7am for hang gliding. Fantastic evening, all in all. 

Day 20 - Thu 26th Feb - Rio

Hang gliding! Crazy trip through morning rush hour, even got to see another favela on the way to jumping off a cliff at Sao Conrado. The ride up to the top of the mountain in a jeep was wild enough. After a 'thorough' lesson that involved practicing running?! We were in the air! 

Incredible experience, not the same adrenalin rush as the bungee jump but spectacular nonetheless. 

Bit of relaxation and reflection in the afternoon followed by another visit to Astor in the evening. 

Day 21 - Fri 27th Feb - Rio

Final morning. Finding breakfast is a must, eventually stumble across a juice bar that also serves scrambled eggs and crepes. Winner winner.....

Despite being served by Miss Surly Waitress 2014 and her speaking no English, we somehow get our order across. Except for Ben who seems to get strawberries on his crepe instead of ice cream, the horror. 

Danny and I head off to the spiritual home of football, Maracana, whereas the rest of the girls head back to clean the flat. 

Beautiful stadium on the inside, outside and the surroundings leave a bit to be desired. Incredibly impressed with the rest though, stunning. 

In the evening, the weary, scarred, intrepid explorers make their way to Galeao airport for the final 2 flights of their epic adventure. Thank you South America, you've been wonderful.